Keep me in prayer. I almost died! Racism in Black Maternal Healthcare is a serious issue that we need to dismantle. During the birth of my son, my calls for medical help were ignored several times. It nearly cost me my life.
I arrived at the hospital with my husband and doula at the point where I was ready to push. No matter how many times I said the baby was coming, no one listened. Fortunately, my doula repeated my concerns, which at least got me to Triage. Once they finally checked me, they realized I wasn’t faking or confused about my own pain. The baby was indeed right there. Only 14 minutes between parking the car and my baby being on my chest proved this was the case.
Then things went left. Yes, more left. I wasn’t feeling well. I expressed this to the nurse and the doctor, but they dismissed my concerns. After the third dismissal I began to second guess myself. Maybe I was confused about my own body? But then I thought about the article I recently read on racial discrimination in maternal healthcare, telling the story of a black woman who died days after coming home from the hospital with her baby. I thought about the numerous times I was ignored in the past. My friend who was ignored, loss too much blood, and went unconscious. I thought about my mother, who died after a cesarean. And how I was left to grow up not knowing what her laugh sounded like. All the nights I cried as a young child wishing that my mother’s death was a lie. Would my children have to grow up with this pain too?
My body rushed with panic and fear. I knew it was implicit bias that was endangering my life. My husband stood to my right and my white doula sat to my left. I reached out to her in an attempt to overcome this bias. “Please tell them I need help. Something is WRONG!” She repeated my words, and like magic they investigated my concerns. Immediately they went into emergency mode and told me I needed surgery. Later on I received apologies for ignoring my pain and concerns throughout my delivery. Apologies?!?! The same thing they would have offered my family if I didn’t come home. Let go of thinking I’m a strong black woman and nothing hurts me, and I will prevail. No, I am human. I am not an Avenger. I’m hurting. My pain is real. I am afraid, and I’m tired.
The stats on childbirth and black maternal health are alarming. In America, black women are 3 times more likely to die from childbirth related complications. If you control for socioeconomic factors, such as education level, it gets worse. Black women with a college degree are 5 times more likely to die from childbirth than their white counterparts. These numbers also change by location. For instance, in New York City, black women are 12 times more likely to die in childbirth than white women.
Fortunately, when I went into labor I was armed with personal experiences, horror stories from friends, and knowledge of the history of healthcare discrimination. This helped empower me to speak up for myself, and to seek out help from those around, instead of relying on the judgment of the healthcare professionals in the room. No one should have to do this. My concerns should have been investigated and addressed as soon as I spoke up.
My heart truly goes out to every mother who is expecting a child. We sacrifice so much on a daily basis from the physical demands of pregnancy. You may have noticed that mothers and little children are my passion. Seeing a mom welcome a new baby in her life brings me tremendous joy. The bond and love of mother and child is unmatched. Pure joy. Every baby deserves for their mother to make it home with them safely. I know far too well the pain of that loss. It’s unexplainable and never goes away.
As I prepare for the birth of my daughter within the next month, I hope that this movement to end racism, bias, and discrimination in our country doesn’t lose steam. No one deserves this type of treatment, or lack of treatment. Let’s continue to stand together for real change and accountability.
Here are some resources to check out on this subject:
Maternal Death Rates High For Black Women
Reducing Disparities in Severe Maternal Morbidity and Mortality
Racial and Ethnic Disparities Continue in Pregnancy Related Deaths (CDC)
Battling Over Birth: Black Women and the Maternal Health Care Crisis
Birthing Justice: Black Women, Pregnancy, and Childbirth